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Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Still no specific news for us

Well no news for us, which doesnt surprise me b/c we are never on the Tuesday grid our agency gets updating all the cases b/c a different center handles our case. Lets see our track record: We were submitted to court in early Jan- (not on Tuesday grid- we never even knew), sent back from court in late January- (not on Tuesday grid, never told), new documents requested by the court in Feb- (not on Tuesday grid- calledon Feb 14 to let us know), regional birth certificate recieved- (not on Tuesday grid, private email), Submited to Court March 7- ON THE GRID (only time), notified of court date April 29 (not on Tuesday grid- emailed/called on a Friday), results of second court date/ court letter recieved- June 1st- (not on Tuesday grid- we phoned MOC),... so we never really expect news on Tuesdays....so the head of the Africa program emailed me today and told me that she is requesting a personal update of our case- basically requesting HOLT ET to contact Mission of Charity for an update. Our letter should be there because word from two other large agency boards have said that MOWCYA is caught up on cases through June 3rd. So we are expecting that the letter and possibly a court decree has been obtained but have not made their way to HOLT Ethiopia staff. So we are really hopeful, even though there hasn't been concrete news today.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

puzzles in my head

i am an over planner....i tend to get myself in complex predicaments with several engagements and projects, usually over lapping. Currently i am planning for Sam to come home, researching/making contacts for his leg issues, taking an online class at USC, trying to get things organized for my "real" job this fall when i am on leave, researching for disertation topics, and entertaining a 7 1/2 year old little boy named Gabe (also my son)- ugh and this is my summer vacation?!!? I feel like i am always trying to figure out logistical tactics -  ENOUGH!! so i am trying to relax more...i took sometime for myself , reading yesterday, making dinner with my husband (he usually does all the cooking)- and bodyflow class today....i need to find some down time when my mind isn't racing and anxiety isn't high from all the unknowns. So what else am i doing right now- PLANNING FOR MY DOWN TIME I AM TAKING ....seriosuly its crazy...hmm? yoga classes, hmm meditation? ...hmmm a new book?...take Gabe to the movies....go to the pool, day with the dogs.....it doesnt end.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

nada

still nothing ...no news on the adoption front

Sunday, June 19, 2011

back to reality

I have a conference for the next two days and some small papers to write for my online course and some curriculum planning for when i am gone from teaching this fall (yay for FMLA)- so i will actually be busy this week with stuff!! I have come off of two weeks of post-Ethiopia-trip recovery and I am not so sure i wanna get back into work-stuff...but it must be done.  Ho Hum....it will divert my obsessive mind from checking my email and phone 324871 times a day looking for adoption news

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Just spectating

well well its my birthday! nothing bg planned...just went to the $ kids movies with Gabe this morning, came home and made lunch. I fear a dead bird or squirell is in my chimney that has a weird sealed iron gate/cover....ugh gross. Gabe is going to his best friends house to sleep over and I hope to make it to an art opening at the museum...just needing to find the free/cheap stuff to do. We usually go to Carowinds - http://tickets.carowinds.com/shop/shopping_general_admission.cfm
with all three kids and me and john...but this year the two oldest are at camp this week...so John and I are taking Gabe to the smaller water park on base tomorrow. Yay- saves like $120 right there.
ADOPTION NEWS: There really is none...thi sis the wonderful grey area where paperwork is possibly/probably being completed and I wait to find out the status on the court decree, birth certificate and such to get submitted to embassy. It seems the Ethiopian court officials are a bit ticked off at the slow down that MOWYCA has instigated with these 5 cases a day pace. The federal courts ordered MOWYCA this week to pick it back up tot he pace it was before March 8 because there have just been too many delays. I hope these two agencies can play nice and get things picked back up...MOWCYA has to issue two or three letters for each adoption case....so them working effeciently is essential.
I didn't want anything special more my b-day other than a court decree and that doesnt look like it will happen this week....oh well ...ho-hum :)

Monday, June 13, 2011

not religious- but it wears on me

so ...i am not an overly religious person. I meditate alot, go to yoga and tai chi classes and attend a Unitarian Universalist congregation...but i am not a typical traditional (and i mean Christian) religious person. In fact the act of prayer makes me feel odd...and its not a lack of belief in a higher power...its a feeling of selfishness. Let me explain,  i am a news junkie and a cultural junkie...i read and listen and watch the news and read, listen and watch media on other countries. I acknowledge that i am in a position of privilege compared to a great deal of the world. I have a stable house, good job, very good education, my health, the ability to choose how to live, a safe country....i have so much. When i try and pray for something, even if has to do with bringing home my beautiful little boy from Ethiopia, i tend to feel selfish and like i should not be asking for anything more. I have so much already.....i long for him to be home, totally believe that we are able to give him a life like he never would have been able to have...but its hard for me to pray for things for myself. I think it has helped that in my mind i can pray for S....i am praying for him to be united and taken home by his family (which just happens to be us)....after seeing the suffering in this world; and mind you, my view has been limited, i find it difficult to pray for anything. If anything were to be "given" to me as a result of a prayer, i would even feel a since of confusion; please award this "answer to a prayer" to someone who really is in need.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

stay mobile

So i am stroller shopping after all..i wasn't certain if i would need one since S just turned 3- but given his leg/surgery situation i am shopping and have found one that is adjustable, lightweight and accomodates up to 50 pounds!
http://www.amazon.com/Contours-Options-Wheeler-Stroller-Cinnamon/dp/B002UKKVIY/ref=cm_cmu_pg__header

And its cool looking :), has good reviews and wont cost an arm and a leg

hope

i hope he knows we are coming back for him...

Monday, June 6, 2011

Trees of Glory Care Point Visit

Hi all- i emailed Karen, who keeps up a wonderful blog called Family from Afar, about our trip to Trees of Glory. She put my picctures and email together in a nice post over on her site. They are still in desperate need of a new well. Please come read about our visit
http://family-from-afar.blogspot.com/2011/06/our-hearts-and-lungs-love-trees-of.html

Friday, June 3, 2011

Sustaining words

....so yesterday I posted a prayer I found while researching the patron saint of abandoned children/orphans. I forgot to share something I found last weekend, as I was up at midnight, waiting on our plane to leave Addis. This quote was in the Real Simple magazine I was reading about Mother's Day....and it struck a cord in me. The author being Agatha Christie is kind of odd, but when i think about this adoption is like solving a mystery for us....we have had so many odd twists and road blocks and have had to hunt down more information Any how...here is the quote which encompasses my heart right now

"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. It dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path."



— Agatha Christie

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Police Letter!

The police letter was finally obtained today, this afternoon in Ethiopia!! Whew...my heart can relax...now for court tomorrow. I really was thinking that it would take weeks. This is a prayer i found while researching the patron saint of orphans (i am not Catholic but felt since the Catholic church has helped to save our son i needed to know which Saint to pray to.- totally not like me- but i just felt compelled to do it)
O God, Father of mercies, who sent Saint Jerome Emiliani as a helper and father to orphans, grant, through his intercession, that we may preserve faithfully the spirit of adoption, by which we are called, and truly are, your children.  Through our Lord.

Friday May 27th- Court

I was sick all night from 10pm until 4am....it felt kind of like food poisoning but not as severe and was pretty much over by daybreak. I thought of this as a bad sign....nothing has come easy for us with this adoption and we continued to have hinderences and frustrations even on our court trip. By 745 am we  were picked up and taken to the Holt offices to review our children's binder. John and I knew to look for the police statement and the birthcertificate- the two main documents that were requested in March for court. We were very excited to see an actual birthdate, or a better approximation as it were. April 8th! This is my step-dad's birthday, so that was pretty cool. We went to court with one other family and began our wait. We were there pretty early, and watched as other families and birth-families came in. The other Holt family was called pretty early and passed! Yay! We went in about half an hour after they did and were pretty dumbfounded as the judge went through her regualr questioning routine and then explained that a new court date was set because our "childs history has not been documented". What?? We have waited and waited in a pool of red-tape paperwork to insure all documents were brought up from Jima. The judge was kinda of surprised we were not told this already by our lawyer and she even questioned him. After speaking with the Holt legal counsel he basically told us that the Mission of Charity was in charge of getting this statement, not him. This confuses me because it is basically a letter from the regional police stating that no one has been looking for S in the last 2 years. I do not beleive that it is only the MOC who can go and request this letter. I beleive that since Jima is 6 hours away and Holt is no longer working with the MOC that they are washing their hands of our case and not putting forth any leg work. This is a new requirement as of this January yet for some reason the document was not obtained for our family.....MOC says Holt should seek it, Holt says MOC should seek it. In the end it is a person from MOC who is helping us the most  and keeping us in the loop. They have phoned the MOC for the Jima region and have had thier sisters requesting the document from the police. However, i am not certain that this has been done many times or to the correct person....Sister Jennifer explained that the woman who is supposed to issue the letter has been hard to contact. Johna nd I feel that the MOC representative should drive down there in person at this point. This letter is needed for several other children as well, and it is holding up many court cases. We have another court date for 6/3/11- but we aren't expecting both items to get there in time.
What an emotional, physical and mental roller coaster the last week has been. We were able to spend so much time with our little boy who is in Addis at the Missions of Charity center (not a HOLT center)- he is special needs, and we needed to have his legs evaluated. We have had some serious concerns about his medical progress or lack there of. There seems to be quite a regression with his club feet :( But being that he is at a special center we got to see him a few hours every day and take him to two doctors and for xrays. Unfortunatley we did not pass court and it is not just because of the MOWA letter. We were half expecting to hear the judge say we did not have the MOWA letter but whe she asked us if we were aware our sons history documents were not recieved she stated that "his history is not documented". And we just kinda stared blankley like deer in headlights, not knowing what she was talking about....we have an abandonement decree, they required us to obtain a birth certificate and we did that too....and now this. All this red tape and my son is in an institution in need of surgery ASAP. Needless to say our hearts are breaking. Please send us good thoughts, positive vibes and prayers. Another court date is set for next week- Friday. We specifically need the police letter and the MOWYA letter. The main thing being the police letter, once that is issued we know MOWA will reissue a positive letter. We really aren't aware of the MOWA letter was there nor not...b/c the other letter just sent us reeling, and thats all we have focused on

After court we went back to the hotel and changed and then requested the driver to take us back to HOLT so that we can further discuss this issue and also have new xrays taken of S's legs. Miruk met us in the drive way and we went to pick up S at MOC- he was so excited to see us. We were given permission to take him to see the dr and get xrays. We spent some time in a beautiful little garden/yard at the xray clinic and S had so much fun sitting and playinjg in the grass. He seemed thrilled to actually be in the grass and not on concrete. We got his xrays and dropped him back off...it was time for lunch and  nap. He was not happy to be taken from us. He loved riding in the van and trying to stick his head out of the window. What a funny baby! We then were able to meet up with several new families arriving for embassy and visit AHOPE and the Leprosy hospital. Everyone else then went to eat Italian food but John and I just wanted to decompress and stay in.....we just felt so hurt and confused. We felt as though significant issues were kept from us until we got in country. Miruk said it best, though, that this first trip is for us to spend time with our child and appear in court as part of the requirement.....but it felt as though we are just mired down with another long wait....after we are already 6 months behind a normal schedule....its really hurting our hearts.